Relationship Reflections

As a few things rattled around in my mind as I prepared to write. I consistently reflected on a very personal in-depth conversation that I had with a long time acquaintance. She lamented consistently about her relationship with someone who she appears to care a lot about. There is no give and take. Simply taking on his part. No consideration, very little affection, helpfulness or just plain ole kindnesses. How can you NOT give a woman a birthday gift?! As I listened I became more frustrated and annoyed at the content of her stories. Although I am fully aware that there are three sides to every story-mine, yours and the truth…I feel that my frustrations are valid because I know both of them well. She has been enormously patient in this relationship and unselfish. Her story is not unique. Change the names and insert the names of someone that you know…and we all can relate.




It puzzles me and has for a very long time as to how people can be with someone – this applies to our family and friends- and be so totally wrapped up into themselves that they fail to see the needs of the other person. The formulas for being involved with someone-regardless of the level of friendship – is very simple…treat that someone as you want to be treated. The challenge is when one of the individual’s begins to take the other for granted. Showing someone that you appreciate them takes little effort and is very cost effective.



To make the concept easier I would like to compare it to money in the bank. If you want to get more out of the bank…you must continue to put more in or replenish what you had. Each time you make a withdrawal (the taking part of the relationship) in order for you to continue withdrawing you must make a deposit (the giving part of the relationship.) If you continue to withdraw and fail to deposit soon your account will be depleted. If a person is giving, attentive, patience, thoughtful, diligent, loving and helpful when you do not acknowledge or appreciate them…soon their emotional account will be depleted. Eventually they will have nothing more for you to withdraw because you failed to make any deposits.



How blessed we are to be loved!! To take this love for granted as well as mistreat it is a blemish on our character. We all are the children of a loving, giving and forgiving Father. Any father who loves his children does not want them mistreated. Cherish love and handle it with care. The love of friends, family, siblings, church families and other unions are an awakening of our spirit and add more meaning and emotional well being to our whole person.



Give generously, willingly, openly and with the faith and the hope of love. Love returns as love. We all need some.